Mother's Day

     I survived yet another first:  my first Mother's Day being a mother of dead children. It definitely wasn't easy and lots of tears were shed. It's a different kind of Mother's Day than I imagined.  You don't get gifts, flowers, or cards.  No breakfast in bed.  No one wishes you a happy Mother's Day.  No one knows the right words to say to you so they avoid you.  But what I did get, was to spend the day looking at the beautiful faces of my 3 precious children and rocking them in their room.  Granted, I looked at a photograph and rocked their ashes, but it did give me some comfort to be able to spend that time with them.  I am so thankful that I have so many beautiful pictures to remember my babies by, pictures that I will treasure forever.  And I am confident in my decision to have them cremated, so I can always have them here with me.  So although having dead babies on Mother's Day is not something anyone should ever have to experience, at least I do have memories of time spent with them, pictures, and their ashes.  So for this Mother's Day, I am thankful for that. 

     Fortunately, the weather cooperated that day and Michael and I were able to get the babies' garden ready for spring. It's not a finished project yet, but I like how it looks so far.